Finding God in the Pursuit of Pregnancy
How to be a good steward of your body during fertility struggles
Amanda Walls, PhD, NTP
6/30/20263 min read
After my second miscarriage, a typical day for me looked like this: wake up and immediately check my fertility app then pee on a stick to check my hormone levels, swallow a handful of supplements I had diligently researched, sit on my back porch and drink a cup of tea that was supposedly going to make me more fertile, spend the day at work unable to focus and instead look up all the possible causes and treatments of recurrent pregnancy loss for the 78th time, eat a gluten-free dairy-free taste-and-enjoyment-free lunch, spend the rest of the day at work listening to a podcast on fertility, come home and try to enjoy time with my husband but spend most of it in tears, swallow another handful of supplements and herbs with dinner, go on a walk and contemplate the days findings and decide what new fertility hack I would try the next day, lay in bed reading a book about fertility, fall asleep with my phone in hand and “probability of 3 miscarriages in a row” typed into the search bar…
Then wake up the next day and repeat. Day after day. Week after week. For months.
One of the things I remember saying often when people would ask about my fertility journey was: “I’m just SO TIRED.”
And when you know what I was doing all day, I think its easy to see why.
I thought I was doing everything I could to fix my body, but looking back on that season, I know I was really doing more harm than good. Even though I was growing closer to God in my grief and truly trying to do His will, I was still completely and utterly exhausted – emotionally, intellectually, and physically – because I was chasing after health and getting pregnant in the way that the Enemy wanted me to, not the way God wanted.
My dear friend, if you are in the midst of a fertility battle right now, I want you to know it doesn’t have to be this way.
You can support your body and your fertility without all the burnout and exhaustion. And even better, you can do it in a way that honors the Lord and draws you nearer to Him.
How? By learning to be a good steward of the body God gave you.
I’m sure most of us Christian women grew up learning that our bodies are a temple and a gift, and that we should care for – steward – them well, but I don’t think we really understand the necessity of true intentional stewardship until we are trying to balance our faith in God with taking control of our health.
Stewardship is a way of caring for your body with reverence for its Creator. It is realizing that our bodies are both a gift from God and a tool to carry out His will. And because of this, stewardship becomes a haven between idolizing health and feeling careless about it.
Practically speaking, being a good steward of your body can look like eating nutritious foods, prioritizing rest, or exercising. But what makes it true stewardship is realizing that the reason you are doing those things is not just to finally get pregnant, but to honor God and His creation.
Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Romans 12:1
If you are struggling with infertility, here are some simple ways you can thoughtfully care for your body while keeping God – not your health – as the focus:
While you are checking your temperature or hormones in the morning, thank God for the technology advancements that help you to understand your body better.
Instead of taking a million supplements and teas that you aren’t even sure will help, explore your local farmer’s market for seasonal produce and try it in a fun new recipe that you share with your family or friends.
Before you get on social media or Google to look for answers, pray that God would lead you to the right people and information, and ask Him to guard your heart against fear and stress.
When you are exercising, thank God for each part of your body you are using and its ability to move and strengthen.
As you are getting into bed each night, reflect on the ways God provided for you and your body that day – even if its as simple as “He gave me the strength and motivation to hit my water goal today.”
When we see every part of our daily fertility journey as an opportunity to grow closer to God, it becomes so much less exhausting. Will there still be hard days? Absolutely, because we are imperfect people and so easily lose sight of God in our pursuit of Him. But those are the days we learn to give ourselves grace. Then we wake up the next day, and try again.
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